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Padme is love by laury_kos

Get your own spectral analysis from Area 23®

So, I went to Shrewsbury today. Mainly 'cause Fall Out Boy's new single came out. =D I had no idea there were two different Vinyl's so I got both of them and the Cd single X3 and I got one of the two Famous Last Words Vinyls O_o I didn't realise it was SQUARE man I thought X3 they forgot to put it in. In HMV O_o I also got avenged sevenfold and t.A.T.u. along with the first three Star Wars films.

Then, we headed to Virgin and I got an AFI, Fall out boy and the new MCR poster, along with the last three Star Wars films, though I didn't get the MCR shirt they had X3 oh well.

Then I headed to salsa and was like "O_O" 'cause you can buy magic mushrooms in there O_o like in the open. Then I headed to Soho's and got some pink hair dye for my hair, and flipped when they had the black parade jackets, though only Mikey's and Gerard's. Mikey's is cheaper in Salsa though =D.

I also got Viva La Bam seasons 2-3 and Romeo and Juliet on DVD 'cause my video is all chewed up :( . I got a new shirt to...... It's pretty cool oh and I got some new headphones because mine just suck when I'm listening to music outside. I'm super hacked :( they didn't have the copy of 'in love and death' I wanted. I'll have to get that online.

Updated my info- well will in a moment to show my last.fm user lolness.

I have a joke. It's not funny, some people seem to think it is.
What kind of music to cows listen to? *first one to get it right wins Pete Wentz*

Only kiddin' about the Pete Wentz thing :) you get a virtual cookie instead.

M, shopping tomorrow. Shrewsbury is awesome for shopping <3 Soho's and HMV and the games store it's so awesome. Way better than cruddy ol' Welshpool.
So, I have to go have this guitar lesson Thursday; well I think it's Thursday. I better be decent at it, damnit. Otherwise I don't even get to try :(

So, I started my new fic the other day and updated part two earlier. I started part three, but I got distracted hahahaha.

I just finished watching Star Wars episode three weeee~ I love Star wars. But now I have Kim Possible on, okay I srlsy need to find something else to watch.

No ones online on MSN :( it sucks a lot. Add my MSN peoples xxhelena_xx[AT]hotmail.com
Stupid spam bots

So I was listening to dirty little secret and I was thinking about this, how everyone has something they have to hide; or something they fear. And then I watched when you say nothing at all, by Ronan Keating, and some of the things that were being put up, pretty much got my brain thinking. And some of them I can relate to, some of them others can, so I was bored and I made a set of wallpapers.
Each one is black and white, and has an inverted version of it; the text being white on black. They're simple and I was bored, but here maybe someone can relate to them in a way.

( under the cut )

OMG OMG OMG. So like I was pestering my mother as to whatn I was gettig for my birthay other than seeing MCR and.. she told me!
A while back I saw this guitar in a store and I fell in love I basically spent ages starin' at it and now she's saying I'm having a £10 lesson first to see if I'm any good at it and if I am =D I get that guitar OMG IM SO HAPPY. I'm grining and like omgomgomgomgomg. I wa slike "I dunno if this is better than MCR or... OMG ITS JUSt THE SAME" OMG........ I#m very very very happy at the moment :) I had my suspicions it was either a guitar, a laptop or a holiday to universal studios X3... omg now roll on the 31st! Dahg ten days

Hey, who else watched channel four this morning. MCR were supposed to be on there :( they weren't.

NEW SINGLE COMES OUT TOMORROW WHOOOOT!!!! X3 I have it preordered and a special one which has all the tracks to X3

You know about my "Friend" Chiaki, chika, ruki, Aimie whatever name I've used. And you know I was pretty angry at myself for some shit which happened.
I happened to stumble accross her again. It was by pure accident, and she seems so happy and I'm glad about it; a little hurt to.
I sent her a message; asking her to forgive me. She probably wont, I just know she wont.
I went onto her Gaia and someone left a message saying "Chiu-chan I love you" and it was like "Thats... what I should be saying"
Maybe a little touch of jealousy; but she obviously doesn't need me anymore, if she's close to other people.
You know; I haven't got someone close I can say that to anymore.
Ashlee, Dana, and the other people I class as my best friends; I know half the time the feelings aren't returned and to be honest, none of them knew me as well as her.
I'm just so upset.
STUPID MYSPACE SHIT
The first one was good; because I got surprised by the person I love
The second; was "If you repost this, an old friend will return" I had her in mind when I did it; but I didn't expect it to work it did. I just dont think she's going to forgive me.
She probably doesn't even care that I've sort of got my life sorted; well am getting it sorted. She most probably hates me; I haven't heard anything back from her.
Should I e-mail her if I don't get a message back or...? She always used to be online 24/7; I'm just afraid she's going to dissapear even when I have her hand and am ready to pull her close.

I guess it doesn't matter if she doesn't forgive me... we'd probably never be as close as what we w- WHO THE FUCK AM I KIDING?! I love that kid for shit, she meant and still means, so much to me.

I don't know what to do maybe I'll just curl up on my bed with my panda bear and sleep... I don't feel like eating if anything I feel like I need some liquor; heck that isn't happening. I'm determind it isn't going to happen.

U.R.G.H!
So, my mother came in like three seconds ago and I asked her if she got Kerrang! Since I wanna read the rest of that MCR thing; you know how Gerard's talking about his split with his gf? I wanna read the rest of it, but like she decided I'm not allowed one cheep magazine. URGH, of all the effin times. So when I got a little "I just wanna read it" shes like "DONT YOU FUCKING TALK TO ME LIKE THAT" and it's like "Whatever" because I wanna try and avoid a fight, uyet all she cal do is push me. Fucking hate her. It's unfair, she hates that I have something I love and basically live for. It's just fuckin' unfair- URGH and then she complained, just now "YOU NEVER FUCKIN ASK HOW MY DAYS BEEN". PSHH DONT I?! I do even though I don't wanna know 'cause it's always as fuckin' boring as hell she forever COMPLAINS so when I'm like "If you hate it so much why don't you fuckin' leave?" she yells at me! I can't win. And like I didn't ask her 'cause I haven't had the chance to yet. Urgh. and then she get's pizza for dinner; I hate pizza and she knows it. So she just screamed at me because "I have to like something" and I'm like "I do, I just hate pizza. And the cheese makes me ill." URGH, she doesn't care that I feel as ill as... whatever. I've been asleep when I haven't been sneezing or trying to find an alternative to pills which isn't working, since I wont touch any form of drugs, I know how stupid I can get at times. Urgh, I just don't get her, she never lets me change my mind. Like, when I went off of anime she FREAKED at me and I was like "Am I not allowed to change?! Am, I just not allowed to realise I was doing nowt with my life". Oh, and now she's picking on the way I sneeze; I can't fuckin' help how loud I sneeze, I mean urgh. And here we go she's starting on the way I talk and hold my fucking cup. So what if I'm "Snobby" and hold it with my little finger out; I always have done since I broke my finger. And I can't help how I talk, so what I sound Welsh and since I've been watching Japanese programs all day my Japanese accent like thing is back and she's saying "Stop speaking like that" when I can't and she knows I can't help that I say "Vat" insted of what. Well it sounds like vat but I gaurentee you, I do say what, it just sounds like vat... Japanese/Welsh hybrid vampire, ne?

One good thing did happen today though I think it's just a coinky dink but I did this thing on MySpace and it was like "Post this and the one you love will surprise you tomorrow". I ain't goin' into what happened, but I was effin surprised.

I have a random obsession with anon posts in MCR coms, hahaha........ the only thing which I smiled -apart from previous said thing- about today. Urgh.

5 MCR
2 Icon bases

The last two are the icon bases :) credit and comment please guys

001

002

003

004

005

006

007

(Click here to post your own answers for this meme.)

✓ I miss somebody right now.	✓ I don't watch much TV these days.  (I mainly have music left on the tv I don't really watch it)	✓ I own lots of books.  (Yep so true)
✓ I wear glasses or contact lenses.	✓ I love to play video games.	× I've tried marijuana.
× I've watched porn movies.	× I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.	✓ I believe honesty is usually the best policy.  (I hate lyers)
× I curse sometimes.  (SOMETIMEs?! All the fucking time)	✓ I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.  (YEah an awful lot)	× I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.

( it goes on... )

Snagged from MySpace =3 I did it twice now X3 it's fun

IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?

So, here's how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player,Creative Zen etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

Opening Credits:
I'm Not Okay (I Promise) - My Chemical Romance

Waking Up:
Friend or Foe - t.A.T.u.

First Day At School:
RUN!RUN!RUN! - Maki Otsuki

Falling In Love:
Helena - My Chemical Romance

Fight Song:
Perfect Enemy - t.A.T.u.

Breaking Up:
Ghost of You - My Chemical Romance (Aww...-O_o this one's stayed the same.. weird)

Prom:
Heaven Help Us - My Chemical Romance

Life's OK:
Thank you for the Venom - My Chemical Romance

Mental Breakdown:
To The End - My Chemical Romance

Driving:
The Jetset life is gonna kill you - MCR

Flashback:
Take it Away - The used

Getting Back Together:
Gomenasai - t.A.T.u.

Wedding:
Headfirst for Halos - MCR

Birth of Child:
Beast and the Harlot - Avenged Sevenfold (HAHA)

Final Battle:
Hang 'em high - MCR

Death Scene:
Boogie Train 03' - Miki Fujimoto (O_o what?...arw)

Funeral Song:
Pretty in Punk - Fall Out Boy

I Encourage everyone to do it! It's fun X3

I'm going to go insane. Everything was fine, just fine. In fact, it was more than fine, and then I was explaining something to my mother, and she just walks over without notice and stares at the computer screen. If she had given me some notice I could've hidden my fuckin' msn chat, I hate her looking at them. Urgh, so then she asked all these questions and I was like "What does it matter?" and then she got all bitchy at me, and she pulled out the "It'd be so much better off without you" on me. Shes never said it before... and it really hurt. I don't know how much more I can take. But what does anyone care! Everyone would be so much happier without me! Urgh. I just... really want and need some help and a friend right now... Thank god for Ashlee coming on right now

Uh huh, go me! Go me! WHOOT! I finally decided, enough was enough and like now >: ) y'all going to need to PAY for all my hard working, shitty assed designs X3 mufufufu. Though of course, everyone whose ordered a layout I haven't finished by now, their's is still free of course. It's only fair.

www.soffio.awardspace.com

MUFUFUF! I need to slice and code everything X3 but it should be up by the end of the week. Lets hope effin PayPal works for me; it never usually does. It should though; I hope. I need to activate everything though. Which I shall probably do in a moment.

Man; I'm so busy believe it or not. I actually said no to someone the other day; which is strange for me; since I'm such a pushover. I have to update my fan fiction, and then I have slicing and coding to do for soffio; and I have a new layout for Sticky Honey, but I don't know if I like it
See it here
Tell me what you think people.

My current obsession is Russian Girls by Sasha Dith, and Famous Last Words by MCR; man I don't know why but my obsession just randomly popped up earlier. The proper video is being shown on the 11th! Whoot; well in America on MTV, thats all I know. I'm going to have to look for the UK... Damn stupid American time zones.

OMG, so my grandparents are going on Holiday next month; I knew nowt about it. And then, like, I'm told their selling their shop and moving back down to Hastings and I'm like "OH FUCKING JOY". Because, it means I'm going to get out less. Urgh; I think my mother will consider moving after though. Heck, she's even seriously thinking about moving away from the UK. I think she knows that once I have enough money and I can legally move out of the UK, she knows I'm going to go any way, I don't think she wants to be left alone so if she moves before I turn 18, then I don't have to move and she can still fuck wit me life X3. I was speaking like a chav last night, to chavs O_o; I was kinda yelling at them out of the window X3 while in my PJ's I may add. Fucking idiots, they thought it was funny-until I threw water over them for saying MCR are a shite band MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA-ahem yes. I'm hyperactive X3

OMG MCR has been on MTV2 three days straight. On Saturday it was the takeover, gonzo, making the video and $2 concert. Yesterday, it was gonzo, making the video and the concert and today O_o it's gonzo and the concert X3

I'm just fucking pissed off with everything, people just can't leave me alone when I want to be left alone! And worse, my mother's on my back about everything urgh. It's so fucking annoying, because now we're both fucked with each other and I just need to kill something. Honestly, I need to kick the shit out of something. She's... driving me insane!!

It started off with Lithium on the TV; then she started being smart and saying things and then we talked about this guy in town, whose a little strange. Hes so chirpy and smart, but he's too smart. and, she goes "It's hard to spot things like that". And I was like "There are many signs for things. I mean, look at depression and suicide. There are so many signs, yet people ignore them." And she was like "Maybe, but how would you know?" and I'm like "I;m not stupid". She shouldn't have to be told, I'm not happy. She should realise that I know a lot about depression, there's a reason for it. And then we got into a discussion about a time when I was at school and I wouldn't go, and she appriently was upset about it. Because, I wouldn't say why. But the fact was, I didn't know at that point it was because I couldn't cope with the people. It was like "I DONT KNOW" and she was like "YOU MUST FUCKING KNOW!" So, she took me to a fucking doctor and it upset me because he implyed I was crazy for being myself. And then she said he wasn't. HE WAS. Whever it sounded like that to her or not, it did to me. And then, when I brought it up just now, she goes "He wasnt't saying that" and I was like "Well, actually, he said there was something wrong with how I acted. Thats basically saying theres something wrong with being yourself" he carried on and implied I was mental. And like, then she goes "No he wasn't impling he never even said that. You just heard it." So... now SHEs saying I'm crazy urgh. I wish she'd understand I'm fucking depressed and I've been having a hard time but now.

And, she was depressed I don't know when but she overdosed on pills god knows when. But, she should be noticing these signs.. yet she's not. I think if she found out then she'd understand why I love MCR so much; I think she'd understand that I depend on them. URGH she's just driving me insane though, it's like urgh. Things were going well as well.

Can't people just... fucking give it a break?!

So, I was talking to someone and they noticed I wa slistening to MCR and I was like "Yeah, what about it?" and they... they bitched so much. I really lost my temper and I was like "Can't you just fucking shut up?!" It upset me to no ends. They were like "Why?" and I was like "Because you don't understand so you can't comment"

And then, another one turned up.

URGH. Man. People don't understand and it's pissing me off. MCR are special, how many other bands can say they've done what MCR have done in such a short space of time? And how many bands can say that most, if not all of their fans have had their lives saved by them once or more?

URGh..... all I know is that MCR make me feel like I can do everything and anything, and they make me feel like I can get through everything.

But people.. they just can't shut the fuck up.

If you have nothing pleasent to say, why say anything at all? And for that matter, why not just not think about it if you hate them so much? I hate Harry Potter, therefore I'm not entitled to say anything about it and I don't! Fucking people drivin' me EFFIN' crazy...

I come baring gifts. Four wallpapers, and 24 icons. The MCR wallpaper is weird; I think, mainly because those images are weird any way, Ray is too small and Bob is too big x.x. As for the FOB one's... XD I only just realised how tiny Patty is X3

Icons
-10 My Chemical Romance
-2 Fall Out Boy (Pete Wentz)
-4 Panic! At The disco (Ryan Ross & Brendon Urie)
-2 Miki Fujimoto
-1 Kingdom Heart's 2 (Riku)
-3 Bleach
-2 Shuffle!
Blank Icon's are NOT bases
Credit and comment ♥
( Icons Under The Cut )
Wallpaper
-2 Fall Out Boy
-1 My Chemical Romance
-1 Shuffle!
( Wallpapers Under The Cut )

Title: Headfirst for Halos
Author: Myself
BETA: skeletal_corpse
Warnings: Rape, Violence, Swearing, Murder
Summary: So, everything turns out for the best. Almost, a fairytale.... Right?
Rating: YA I guess
Parings: Ray/OC, Gerard/OC
Author Notes: And, here's the rest of the fanfic. I couldn't wait to post one a day; especially since I have a new fic planned and the sequel started; if I get it finished then it shall be posted. As for my other fic; I think I have an original idea! Amazing, huh? This part's mainly like an epilouge
Comments make me fuzzy!
Disclaimer: I do not own MCR nor know them. I own all OC's unless otherwise stated.
Past Chapters:
Chapter one
Chapter two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
( Chapter Thirteen )

Title: Headfirst for Halos
Author: Myself
BETA: skeletal_corpse
Chapter title: Consulting Affairs
Warnings: Rape, Violence, Swearing, Murder
Summary: The guy's have gone on tour, and Luci's gone home to England, so Katya's left alone. After a phone call from Mikey, she goes out and meets them on tour. She, also meets Gerard's surprise.
Rating: YA I guess
Parings: Ray/OC, Gerard/OC
Author Notes: Sorry it took a while, but I have it alllll finished. Completely. Now, I just have to start on the Sequel :).
Comments make me fuzzy!
Disclaimer: I do not own MCR nor know them. I own all OC's unless otherwise stated.
Past Chapters:
Chapter one
Chapter two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
( Chapter Twelve )

Title: Headfirst for Halos
Author: Myself
BETA: skeletal_corpse
Chapter title: Consulting Affairs
Warnings: Rape, Violence, Swearing, Murder
Summary: The guy's have gone on tour, and Luci's gone home to England, so Katya's left alone. After a phone call from Mikey, she goes out and meets them on tour. She, also meets Gerard's surprise.
Rating: YA I guess
Parings: Ray/OC, Gerard/OC
Author Notes: Sorry it took a while, but I have it alllll finished. Completely. Now, I just have to start on the Sequel :).
Comments make me fuzzy!
Disclaimer: I do not own MCR nor know them. I own all OC's unless otherwise stated.
Past Chapters:
Chapter one
Chapter two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
( Chapter Eleven )